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I was in the hard state of the usual privations of my Beloved Good, and I felt immersed in bitterness, deprived of He who alone makes sun, warmth, smile and happiness arise in my poor soul. Without Him, it is always nighttime; I remain numb with the cold of His privation – I am unhappy. So I felt oppressed; and my sweet Jesus, moving in my interior, told me: "My daughter, courage, do not abandon yourself prey to oppression. If you knew how much I suffer in seeing you suffer! I suffer so much that, in order not to see you suffer so much, I put you to sleep, but I remain close to you; I do not leave you. And while you sleep, I do for you what we should be doing together, if you were awake; because it is not you who want to sleep, but it is I who want it, and so I make up for you. Do you see how much I love you? If you knew how much I suffer when I see you wake up and fidget, because you have not realized that I was close to you, since I Myself had put you to sleep in the torment of my privation. It is true that you suffer – I too suffer; but it is the bond of my Will which flows in you also in this, and clasping you more, renders our union even more stable.
Therefore, courage, and remember that you are the little boat of my Will; and the Divine Will is not a sea of water, which has its ports and shores, where boats, ships and passengers make their stops, where they rest, have a good time, and many passengers don’t even return to cross the sea. The sea of my Will is sea of Light and of Fire, with no port and no shore. Therefore, there are no stops for my little boat. She must cross It continuously, but with such speed as to enclose the whole unending Eternity in each one of your heartbeats and acts; in such a way as to connect them to that Eternal Heartbeat and Act, which is heartbeat and act of everyone. And you, crossing over all, will go around Eternity at each one of your heartbeats; you will take everything, and will bring Us all that comes from the Divinity in order to give and to receive – but which gives without receiving. And my little boat has the task to cross the immense sea of my Will in order to give Us return of all that comes from Us. So, if you oppress yourself, you will lose attention in the round, and the sea of my Will, not feeling shaken by the fast rounds of my little boat, will burn you even more and you will fidget even more because of my privation. But if you keep going around, you will be like that sweet little breeze which, bringing refreshment to my Fire, will serve you to sweeten the torment you suffer because of my privation."
