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I felt all annihilated within myself. The privations of Jesus throw me into the most profound humiliation. Without Jesus, I feel the interior of my soul devastated; it seems that all the good declines and dies. My Jesus! My Jesus! How hard is your privation! Oh, how my heart bleeds in seeing that everything dies in me, because the One who is Life, and the only One who can give Life, is not with me!
Then, while I was in this state, my most sweet Jesus came out from within my interior, and placing His hand upon my heart and pushing strongly on it, He told me: "My daughter, why do you afflict yourself so much? Abandon yourself in Me and let Me do; and when it seems to you that everything declines and dies, your Jesus will make everything rise again, but more beautiful and more fecund.
You must know that the soul is my field in which I work, sow and harvest; but my favorite field is the soul who lives in my Will. In this field my work is delightful; I do not get covered in mud when I sow, because my Will has converted it into a field of Light. Its earth is Virgin, pure and celestial, and I amuse Myself very much in sowing little lights in it, almost like a dew which forms the Sun of my Will… Oh, how beautiful it is to see this field of the soul all covered with many drops of Light which, as they grow, form many suns! This sight is enchanting; all Heaven is enraptured at their sight, and they are all attentive on looking at the Celestial Farmer who cultivates this field with such great mastery, and who possesses a seed so noble as to convert it into a Sun.
Now, my daughter, this field is Mine and I do whatever I want with it. Once these suns have formed, I collect them and I take them to Heaven, as the most beautiful conquest of my Will, and then I go back to the work of my field. So, I put everything upside down, and the Little Daughter of my Will feels that everything is over, everything is dying. She sees those suns, so refulgent, being substituted by the drops of light which I am sowing, and she thinks that everything is perishing. How you deceive yourself! This is the new harvest that must be prepared; and since I want to make it more beautiful than the first one, and make it larger in order to double my harvest, at first sight it seems that the work is more difficult, and the soul suffers more. But those pains are like strokes of a hoe into the earth, which push the seed deeper down, in order to make it sprout more safely, with greater fecundity and beauty. Don’t you see when a field is harvested – how desolate and poor it remains? But it lets itself be sowed again, and you will see it more beautiful than before. Therefore, let me do; and you, by living in my Will, will always be at work with Me; we will sow the little drops of light together, and we will compete to see who sows more. So, we will amuse ourselves now in sowing, now in resting – but always together… I know, I know what your strongest concern is – that I may leave you. No, I will not leave you. One who lives in my Will is inseparable from Me."
And I: ‘My Jesus, You told me that when You did not come it was because You wanted to chastise people, and now it is not because of this that You don’t come, but for something else.’
And Jesus, as though sighing: "They will come – the chastisements will come. Ah, if you knew." And having said this, He disappeared.
