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These days, my adorable Jesus continues to make Himself seen very few times; His visit is like a flash – when one would want to keep on looking, it is already gone; and if sometimes He stays for a little while, it is almost always in silence. Other times, He says something, but the moment He goes away, He seems to withdraw that word, together with the light that comes to me from His word; so much so, that afterwards, I no longer remember anything of what He said, and my mind remains in the same confusion as before. What a miserable state! My dear Jesus, have pity on this misery – continue to make use of your mercy!
So, in order not to be too long, saying what happened to me day by day, I will say now, all at once, a few words He told me in these past days.
I remember that after I had shed most bitter tears, Jesus made Himself seen, and since I lamented to Him that He had left me, Jesus called many Angels and Saints to Himself, and turning to them, He said: "Listen to what she says – that I have left her. Tell her a little – can I leave those who love Me? She has loved Me – how can I leave her?" The Saints were in agreement with the Lord, and I remained more humiliated and confused than before.
Another time, after I said to Him, ‘In the end, You will end up leaving me completely’, Jesus said to me: "Daughter, I cannot leave you, and as a pledge of this I have placed my sufferings in you." Then, while I was occupied with this thought, ‘How is it, Lord, that You have permitted the coming of the confessor? Everything could have passed between me and You’, in one instant, I found myself outside of myself, lying on a cross, but there was no one who could nail me to it. I began to pray the Lord to come to crucify me Himself, and Jesus came and told me: "See how necessary it is for the priest to be in the middle of my works - and this is just help to complete the crucifixion. Indeed, without anybody else, you cannot crucify yourself by yourself; it always takes the help of others."
