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This morning, as my adorable Jesus came, He carried me outside of myself, but to my greatest sorrow I saw Him from behind, and as much as I prayed Him to let me see His most holy face, it was impossible. In my interior I kept saying: ‘Who knows whether it is because of my oppositions against the obedience to write that He does not deign to show His adorable face.’ And while saying this, I cried. After He let me cry, He turned around and told me: "I take your oppositions into no account, because your will is so identified with Mine, that you cannot want but what I Myself want. So, though it is repugnant for you, at the same time you feel drawn to do it as by a magnet; therefore, your repugnances serve for nothing else but to render the virtue of obedience more embellished and bright. This is why I ignore them."
Afterwards, I looked at His most beautiful face, and in my interior I felt an indescribable contentment; and turning to Him, I said: ‘My most sweet Love, if I take so much delight in looking at You, what must it have been for our Queen Mama, when You enclosed Yourself in Her most pure womb? What contentments, how many graces did You not give Her?’ And He: "My daughter, the delights and the graces that I poured into Her were such and so many, that it is enough to tell you that what I am by nature, our Mother became by grace; more so, since She had no sin, and therefore my grace was able to lord freely within Her. There is nothing of my Being which I did not give to Her."
At that instant, I seemed to see our Queen Mother as if She were another God, with this difference alone: that in God this is His own nature, while in Mary Most Holy it is acquired grace. Who can say how stupefied I was left; how my mind was lost in seeing a portent of grace so prodigious? So, turning to Him, I said: ‘My dear Good, our Mother had so much good because You let Yourself be seen intuitively. I would like to know: how do You show Yourself to me – by abstractive or by intuitive sight? Who knows whether it is even abstractive at all.’ And He: "I want to make you understand the difference that passes between one and the other. In the abstractive, the soul contemplates God, while in the intuitive she enters into Him and obtains graces – that is, she receives within her the participation in the Divine Being. How many times have you not participated in my Being? That suffering, which seems almost natural in you; that purity by which you reach the point of feeling as if you did not have a body, and many other things – have I not communicated this to you when I have drawn you to Myself intuitively?"
Ah, Lord, it is so true! And I – what thanks have I rendered You for all this? What has been my correspondence? I feel blushing at the mere thought of it. But, O please! Forgive me, and let it be known, in Heaven and on earth, that I am an object of your infinite mercies.
