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I was feeling all abandoned in the Supreme Volition, but all tormented by the total privation of my sweet Jesus. Oh! how I felt my poor soul being torn to pieces. What tearings without mercy and without pity, because the One who alone can heal tearings so cruel is far away, and seems not to care about the one who, for love of Him, is so cruelly tormented. But while I was swimming in my sorrow, I was thinking of when my sweet Jesus was about to come out of the womb of His beloved Mama to fling Himself into Her arms. Oh! how I too would have wanted to squeeze Him in my arms, to form sweet chains for Him, so that He might no longer depart from me. But while I was thinking of this, I felt my poor mind outside of myself, and I saw my Celestial Mama, all veiled with light, and, in Her arms, little Baby Jesus, fused in the same light. But it lasted only a few instants, and then everything disappeared, and I remained more afflicted than before. However, later He came back, and clasping His little hands around my neck, He told me: “My daughter, as soon as I came out of the womb of my Mama, I fixed my gazes – one on my dear Mama; nor could I do without looking at Her, because in Her was the enrapturing force of the Divine Will and the sweet enchantment of the beauty and most refulgent light of my Fiat which, eclipsing my pupil, made Me remain fixed in She who possessed my very life by virtue of It. Seeing my life bilocated in Her enraptured Me, and I could not remove my gaze from the Celestial Queen, because my very divine force compelled Me to fix on Her. The other gaze I fixed on the one who was to do and possess my Will. They were two links connected together – the Redemption and the Kingdom of my Divine Will – inseparable from each other. The Redemption was to prepare, suffer, do; the Kingdom of the Fiat was to fulfill and possess - both of them of highest importance. Therefore, my gazes were fixed on the chosen ones to whom both one and the other were entrusted, because there was my very Will in them that enraptured my pupil. Why do you fear, then, if you have the gaze of your Jesus always looking at you, defending you, protecting you? If you knew what it means to be looked upon by Me, you would no longer fear anything.”
Then, afterwards, I continued to think about the Divine Will; and my always lovable Jesus added: “My daughter, when Our Divinity formed the Creation, It placed the Divine Will as raw material in all things, and so all things had their shape, solidity, order and beauty. And everything the soul does with this raw material of my Will, since a vital act flows within it, receives from It the shape of the beautiful works, all ordered and solid, with the imprint of the life of the Divine Fiat within each work. On the other hand, one who does not do my Will and does not put It as raw material in his works, might do perhaps many things, but all disordered, without shape, without beauty, all scattered, such that he himself would not know how to make head or tail of them. It would happen as if someone wanted to make bread without water; he might perhaps have much flour, but since the water is missing, the life to form the bread would be missing. Someone else might have many stones in order to build, but does not have the lime that unites and cements the stones together; so, he would have a disorder of stones, but never a house. Such are the works without the raw material of my Will; they only occupy space, they cause bother, annoyance; and if they do any good at all, it is superficial – if they are touched, they are found to be fragile and empty of any good.”
