The Book of Heaven
—Unofficial Version—

January 6, 1900

Confidence, the staircase to ascend to the Divinity.

This morning I received Communion, and as I found myself together with Jesus, the Queen Mama was also there, and – oh, marvel! – I looked at the Mother and I could see Her Heart transmuted into Baby Jesus; I looked at the Son and I could see the Mother in the Heart of the Baby.  In the meantime, I remembered that today is the Epiphany, and in the example of the Holy Magi, I was to offer something to Baby Jesus, but I saw myself as having nothing to give Him.  So, in seeing my misery, the thought came to me of offering my body as myrrh, with all the sufferings of the twelve years in which I had been in bed, ready to suffer and to remain there as much longer as He pleased; as gold, the pain I feel when He deprives me of His presence, which is the most painful and sorrowful thing for me; as incense, my poor prayers, united to those of the Queen Mama, so that they might be more pleasing to Baby Jesus.  So I made the offering with full confidence that the Baby would accept everything.

Jesus seemed to accept my poor offerings with great pleasure, but that which He enjoyed the most was the confidence with which I had offered them.  Then He said to me:  “Confidence has two arms:  with one it embraces my Humanity, and it uses my Humanity as a staircase in order to ascend to my Divinity; with the other it embraces the Divinity and draws celestial graces in torrents, in such a way that the soul remains all inundated within the Divine Being.  When the soul is confident, she is certain to obtain what she asks.  I let my arms be bound, I let her do whatever she wants, I let her penetrate even into my Heart, and I let her take, by herself, that which she has asked from Me.  If I did not do so, I would feel Myself in a state of violence.”  While He was saying this, many rivulets of a liqueur (I call it ‘liqueur’, but I can’t really tell what it was) came out from the breast of the Baby and of the Mother, which inundated my soul completely.  Then the Queen Mother disappeared.

After this, together with the Baby I went out into the vault of the heavens.  I saw that His gracious face was sad, and I said to myself:  ‘Maybe He wants milk, this is why He is sad.’  So I said to Him:  ‘Do You want to suckle from me since the Queen Mama is not here?’  But before doing this, I became concerned that it might be the devil; so, in order to be reassured, I signed him several times with the cross and I said to him:  ‘Are you really Jesus the Nazarene, the Second Person of the Most Holy Trinity, Son of the Virgin Mary, Mother of God?’  And the Baby assured that He was.  Therefore, being assured, I placed Him to suckle from myself.  The Baby seemed to revive, assuming a merry appearance, and I saw that He was suckling part of those rivulets with which He Himself had inundated me.  And while He was doing this, I felt my heart being pulled, as it seemed that that milk which Jesus was drawing from me was coming out from it.  Who can say what passed between me and Baby Jesus?  I have no tongue to be able to manifest it, no words to be able to describe it.