The Book of Heaven
—Unofficial Version—

May 4, 1906

Fears and tears of the soul. Jesus asks her to be more precise in writing.

I was very afflicted for not having seen my adorable Jesus clearly, with the addition that my thought was telling me that Jesus, He who is my life, did not love me any more. Oh, God, what mortal pains my poor heart felt! I did not know what to do to free myself from this. I shed bitter tears, and to free myself I said: ‘He does not love me any more? - and out of spite that He does not love me any more, I will love Him more than before.’ I wrote this to obey. Then, after much hardship, He came, bearing my tears on His face. I did not understand well why, but it seemed to me that since that thought had excited me and almost irritated me into loving Him more, pleased with it, He would almost say to me: "What - I do not love you? I love you so much that I keep an account even of your tears, and I bear them on my face for my pleasure."

Then, afterwards, He added: "My daughter, I want you to be more precise, more exact, and to manifest everything in writing, because you skip many things, even though you take them for yourself without writing them; but many things will serve others." On hearing this, I remained confused because, in truth, I do this, and my repugnance to write is so great, that only the miracles that obedience can do could conquer me, since of my own will I would not be good at writing a single coma. May everything be for the glory of God and to my confusion.