The Book of Heaven
—Unofficial Version—

December 22, 1909

The reason for the states of abandonments in holy souls before their death.

Having received Communion, I was lamenting to blessed Jesus because of His privations, for if He comes, it is almost always like a flash, or He remains all silent. And Jesus told me: "My daughter, in almost all souls to whom I have communicated Myself in an extraordinary way, I have allowed these states of abandonments at the end of their lives. This, not only because of certain other purposes of mine, but also in order to be honored and glorified in all of my conduct. In fact, many say: ‘Of course these souls were to reach such a high point of sanctity, and they loved Him so much! With so many favors, with so many graces and charisms, they would have to be really ungrateful not to reach that level. If we had received them, we too would have reached it – more than them.’ So, in order to justify my conduct, I will manifest to them the abandonments, the privations in which I put these souls, which is a living purgatory for them; and also their faithfulness, the heroism of their virtues, and how it is easier to suffer poverty when one does not know riches, than to be born rich, getting used to living as a rich person, and then lose the riches and live like a poor one. More so, since the supernatural riches are not like the material ones, which serve the body and, at most, diffuse on the outside. The supernatural riches penetrate deep into one’s marrow, into the most intimate fibers, into the noblest part of the intelligence. It is enough to say that it is more than martyrdom. I Myself am moved to pity so much, that my Heart almost breaks with tenderness; and I am forced to feel it break so very often that I cannot resist, also to give them the strength to fulfill their consummation. All Angels and Saints keep their gazes fixed on them, and they watch over them for Me, so that they may not succumb, knowing the crude martyrdom they suffer. My daughter, courage, you are right; but know that everything is Love in Me."

And as He was saying this, He seemed to be moving farther away. I felt my very nature being consumed and melted into nothingness. Those seeds of strength, of light, of knowledge which I seemed to feel – everything turned into nothing. I felt I was dying; yet, I live. In the meantime He came back, and taking me in his arms, He seemed to sustain this nothingness of mine, telling me: "Do you see, my daughter, how, as the little seed of your strength, the little lamp of your light, the little knowledge of Me that you have, and all of your other little qualities dissolve, my strength, my light, my wisdom, my beauty and all of my other qualities take over and fill this nothingness of yours? Aren’t you happy?"

And I said to Him: ‘Listen, Jesus, if you continue in this way, You will lose taste for keeping me on earth.’ And I repeated this various times. And Jesus, not wanting to listen to my words, answered: "Listen, my daughter, I will never lose taste for you - if I keep you on earth, I will have my taste on earth; if I take you to Heaven, I will have my taste in Heaven. Do you know, rather, who will lose taste? Your confessor."