The Book of Heaven
—Unofficial Version—

September 9, 1910

Laments of the soul for not being able to hold back the chastisements.

Continuing in my usual state, blessed Jesus was not coming, and I was saying to myself: ‘How Jesus has changed with me; how He no longer loves me as before! Before I was permanently bedridden, when there was the cholera, He Himself begged me that if I accepted sufferings for a few days, He would make the cholera cease; and since I accepted them, the scourge did cease. But now, he keeps me continuously in bed, one hears about the cholera and the torments it causes to the poor people, and He does not want to listen to me. How He no longer wants to make use of me!’ While saying this, I went about looking within me, and I saw Jesus there, with His head raised, looking at me and listening to me, all moved. And when He saw that I noticed He was looking at me, He told me: "My good daughter, how importunate you are to Me! You want to win by force, don’t you? All right, all right, but do not molest Me any more." And He disappeared.