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I felt highly afflicted because of the privation of my sweet Jesus. As much as I called Him and prayed, He would not deign to return to His little exiled down here. Ah, how hard is my exile! My poor heart agonized because of the pain it felt, because the One who forms its life was far away form me. But as I longed for His return, the Confessor came, and at that moment, after so much waiting, Jesus moved in my interior, squeezing my heart tightly and making Himself seen.
And I to Him: ‘My Jesus, couldn’t You come before? Now I must obey. If You please, You will come when I receive You in the Most Holy Sacrament; then, we will be alone again, and we will be free to be together.’
And Jesus, with a dignified and indifferent look, told me: "My daughter, do you want Me to destroy the order of my Wisdom and to take away this authority from my Church?" And in saying this, He made me share in His pains.
Then, afterwards, I said to Him: ‘But tell me, my Love, why don’t You come? You made me wait so long as to almost make me lose the hope of your return; and because of this pain, my heart struggles between life and death.’ And Jesus, all goodness: "My daughter, having placed in you the ownership of my Will, I want you not only to possess It, but to be able to keep It, cultivate It, expand It, so as to multiply It. Therefore, pains, mortifications, vigilance, patience, and also my very privation, serve to expand and to keep the boundaries of my Will in your soul.
It is not enough to possess – but to be able to possess. What good is it for a man to possess a land, if he does not take the care of sowing, cultivating it, keeping it, in order to then harvest the fruits of his hard work? If he does not work his property, even though he possesses it, one could say that he has nothing to eat. Therefore, it is not possessing which renders man rich and happy, but being able to cultivate well what he possesses.
The same with my graces, my gifts, and especially my Will, which I placed in you as a Queen. It wants from you the food, the work of your pains, of your acts. It wants your will, fully subjected to It, to give It in everything the honors and the courting which befit It as Queen. And in everything you do and suffer, It will have its food ready to feed your soul. And so, you on one side, and my Will on the other, will expand the boundaries of my Supreme Will within you."
