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I felt like dying because of the privation of my sweet Jesus. Then, after much hardship, He moved in my interior and He shared His pains with me, but so much that I felt like suffocating. I felt the rattle of agony, and yet, I myself am unable to tell who was the cause of my pains. I only felt an immense Light, and this Light turned into pain for me. Then, after having somehow suffered, my adorable Jesus told me: "My daughter, this is why I did not want to come – because the pains I suffered were many, and in coming to you, my faithful one who is inseparable from Me, my Love would have led Me to share them with you, and in seeing you suffer, I would have suffered - in seeing you suffer because of Me."
And I: ‘Ah, my Jesus, how you have changed! It shows that You no longer want to suffer together with me – You want to do it by Yourself. After all, if I am no longer worthy to suffer together with You, do not hide, but come without making me suffer. It is true that not taking part in your pains would be a nail too piercing for me, but it would be less painful than your privation."
And Jesus: "My daughter, you do not know the nature of true love, and this is why you speak in this way. True love can hide nothing to the beloved - either joys or pains. For one sorrowful thought, for one fiber of the heart, which it hides and does not pour into the beloved, it feels as though separated from her, discontent, restless; and until it pours all its heart into the loved one, it cannot find rest. So, coming without pouring in you all my Heart, my pains, my joys and the ingratitude of men, would be too hard for Me. I would rather content Myself with remaining as though hidden in the depth of your soul, instead of coming without sharing with you my pains and my most intimate secrets. Therefore, I will be content with suffering in seeing you suffer, rather than not pour all of my Heart in you."
And I: ‘My Jesus, forgive me. I said this because You said that You suffered in seeing me suffer; but let nothing ever be, which may divide us in love – rather, any pain; but separate, never.’
And Jesus added: "Do not fear, my daughter; wherever my Will is, there cannot be separation in love. In fact, I did nothing to you; it was the Light of my Will to make you suffer. Penetrating into you as most pure light, It brought my pains down to the most intimate fibers of your heart. My Will is more piercing than any sword; more than nails, thorns and scourges. Being most pure light, in Its immensity, It sees and encloses everything; therefore, it contains the power of all pains, and as It makes Its light penetrate the soul, It brings the pains It wants. So, since your will and Mine are one, the current of Its light brought you my pains.
So did my Divinity operate in my Humanity. Its most pure Light brought Me pains at every breath, at every heartbeat, at every movement – into my whole Person. Nothing was hidden to It – either that which was needed in order to restore the glory of the Father on the part of creatures, or their offenses, or that which was needed in order to save them. Therefore, It spared Me nothing; Its most pure Light crucified my most intimate fibers, my heartbeats of fire, and so It made of Me the perpetual Crucified – and not only in my hands and feet; rather, Its Light, scanning Me completely, crucified the most tiny particles of my Person.
Ah, if creatures knew what my Divine Will made my Humanity suffer for love of them, they would be drawn to love Me as by a powerful magnet. But for now they cannot, because their taste is rough and profaned by the human will, and they would not enjoy the sweet fruits of the pains of my Divine Will. More so, since by living at the bottom – in the human will – they would not understand the height, the power, the attitude, the goods, which the Divine Will contains. But the time will come when the Supreme Will, making Its way in the midst of creatures and making Itself understood more, will manifest the pains which my Eternal Will made my Humanity suffer.
Therefore, when the Light of my Will flows in you, let yourself be scanned by It, that It may accomplish Its perfect and full work in you. And if you do not see Me often, do not afflict yourself; these are the new events which are preparing and unexpected things for the poor world - but the Light of my Will will never be lacking to you."
After this, my adorable Jesus disappeared, and I felt as though submerged in His Will. I felt my poor littleness in contact with the divine greatness, height and immensity; my misery touched by divine riches; my ugliness touching the eternal Beauty. In His Will I lived of the reflections of God, and while receiving everything from Him, I found everything and I carried all Creation on my lap at the feet of the Eternal Majesty. It seemed to me that in His Will I did nothing but ascend to Heaven and descend upon earth, to ascend again in order to bring all generations, to love Him for all, and to make Him loved by all.
Then, while I was doing this, my Jesus made Himself seen again and told me: "My daughter, how beautiful and delightful it is to see the creature live in Our Will! She lives from Our reflections, and while living from Our reflections, she absorbs the likeness of her Creator within herself. So she is embellished, enriched, enlarged, so much as to be able to take everyone and to bring all to Us; and she draws so much love from Us as to be able to love Us for all. And We find in her all Our Love, which We delivered in Creation, Our satisfaction, Our contentment and the return of Our works. Our Love for the soul who lives in Our Will is so great that, by virtue of our Will, the soul becomes that which We are by nature. We pour everything into her; not even a fiber do We leave out which is not filled of Our own. We fill her so much as to make her overflow, forming divine rivers and seas around her; and We descend into these seas to amuse Ourselves, admiring Our works with love, and feeling fully glorified.
Therefore, my daughter, live in the most pure Light of my Will, if you want your Jesus to repeat again that word which He said in creating man: "By virtue of Our Will, let Us make this soul in Our Image and Likeness."
